You know what I dislike about every wedding I’ve been to? Well, a lot. I mean there’s the wait, and the horrible music. And all the strangers you don’t know. And all the people that say they knew you when you were this tall. Okay, there are a lot of things.

But one of the things I don’t like are all the couples being all cute and shit and feeding each other and giggling. Yeah, I know. That’s my inner fuqboi and jealousy talking, but man. Going to a wedding single sucks.

My cousin (I think he’s my cousin. I’m not really sure-I befriended him at the temple once when we were young kids and he introduced me to Pokemon and even gave me my first Pokemon game! But I didn’t know he was my cousin. Or so-called cousin. I don’t know) has a pretty attractive girlfriend. I was like, “Woah, she’s cute is she a relative?” But later I realized that she was dating my white cousin. I shall refer to him as such since he is half Asian like me, but he doesn’t look like it and looks completely like his other half.

Lucky bastard.